Chuck versus Real Life
by MissFriday
Summary: One Shot. "Trust me Chuck."


**A/N: Thanks for taking the time to read this. I'm not used to writing in present tense, so I've kept it short. This looks at Chuck's thoughts at the beginning of season 1. All reviews are very welcome.**

The sun is rising when he eventually finds himself on the beach. It's quiet, and Chuck's surprised to realise that there's nobody else out here. It's just him and his thoughts. After the day he's had, he needs some time alone.

He doesn't understand why he was stupid enough to think that Sarah Walker could have ever been interested in a nerd like him. In what other universe would she have walked over to him and asked him out. Guys like him never got the girl. It was always someone like Bryce Larkin.

That brings him back to Bryce. Bryce Larkin, super spy. The man who was responsible for his whole world crashing down. Chuck wishes he could speak to Bryce right now, to ask him what the hell he was thinking but he knows it's too late. It's much too late.

Chuck glances behind him and sees that familiar car parked across the street. Of course he's not alone. There's no way the government wouldn't be keeping an eye on him after everything that's happened. He sighs, and turns his head back to the sea, watching the sun rise behind the sapphire waves that remind him painfully of those bright blue eyes.

Over the sound of the lapping waves he hears footsteps behind him. To his credit he doesn't jump but he knows that she's making no effort to conceal the noise. She's a super spy; if she didn't want him to know she was there he wouldn't have.

He feels the wind in his hair and absentmindedly wonders if he should run a hand through it in an effort to tame it. But why bother? They aren't really together. They never will be.

Chuck doesn't look at her as he reaches her. He doesn't know if he can just yet. Instead, he continues to stare out to sea.

"How long have you been here?" He asks quietly.

"All night." Sarah sits down beside him. She's closer than he would have liked, but too far away at the same time.

He frowns before glancing at her. Of course she's been there all night. She's been keeping an eye on him the whole time. Protecting him. Part of him wants to yell at the injustice of it. She's there to protect him, but the thing he needs protecting from the most is his heart.

It's her job, he tells himself. That's the reason she's here with you right now. There's nothing more to it.

"There's nowhere I can run, is there?"

She sighs quickly and he wonders if she's frustrated with him. He knows if the situation were reversed he would be. He's not exactly making her job easy. Chuck half expects her to yell at him but when she replies her voice is surprisingly soft.

"Not from us."

He doesn't reply. He knew the answer before he even asked it. There's nowhere he can go, no escape from this reality. He's stuck, and he knows it. Chuck's not sure if he can accept that yet. He was just a normal person and now…

"Talk to me Chuck."

For a moment he considers telling her no. After all, she's the one who has come and complicated his life beyond anything. He scolds himself internally. That's not her fault. She's following orders. She's protecting him. For now at least.

"Yesterday I was making eleven bucks an hour fixing computers," he tells her. "Now I have one in my brain." He doesn't mean to state the obvious but he's clarifying it to himself more than to her. He needs to accept this or he's never going to get anywhere.

"And I can't figure out why Bryce did this," he admits. "Why he chose me." Chuck's quiet for a moment but Sarah doesn't speak. "What are you going to do with me?" he asks finally. "What happens now?"

She sighs again. "For now you go back to your old life. We'll protect you and you'll work with us." He looks at her and sees something in her eyes. Sympathy maybe? But no, that can't be right. She's a government agent. She sees him as an asset.

He avoids asking her that and instead directs the conversation somewhere else. "And my sister? And my friends? Are they in danger?"

Chuck knows that if she says yes he'll have to leave them. If something happened to Ellie or Morgan or Awesome… even to Jeff and Lester, he knows he would never be able to forgive himself. He's convinced himself so much that this will happen that he's almost cheered by her response.

"Tell them nothing to keep them safe."

So he didn't have to leave them. He didn't have to leave but he had to lie. He had to lie to his best friend and his sister, the two people he had always confided in. But if it was for their own safety… he would lie. He sighs heavily.

"I need you to do one more thing for me," Sarah says and he looks up at her. After everything that has happened she wants to ask him for more. He's not sure he can take it right now but he nods all the same.

"Yeah?" He could never really say no to her.

"Trust me Chuck." That catches him off guard. Their eyes finally meet and he smiles for the first time. He doesn't answer her but when she smiles he knows she understands.

They both look away again, staring out at the sea. He wishes he knew what she was thinking. Sarah bumps his shoulder gently; it's the most he's really comfortable with. If this was the end of a real date he'd have his arm around her, maybe even kiss her head.

But it's not real, he reminds himself. This life that he wants, with the girl of his dreams… it's not real.

It never will be.


End file.
